Our day started with use hitting a big object that looked like a pencil. Wow! It is the biggest thing I have ever seen. Then Corrie screamed, " Why that is like the biggest chimney that I have ever seen." Wow were almost in fort Laramie. We are a week away and some aliens came and stole some of our supplies and now what are we going to do. Curse the aliens that came and took the suppose that we are going to need or we will die. Some big bugs came and went in the flour and we had to get ride of it. We are a third of the way to the new land and live there the rest of the time. Then a giant misquote came and squirted water into Hubert's mouth. "AAADSADSSASDASRAWERYEAWRSRDYSEAWQ$E%YRTDRSEARW$%RYTDRSEW!" Then it flew us to two forts. At one fort we swapped our oxen for new oxen for 50$. Then a Giant bird with laser eyes blew up a mountain ahead of us. and took us to a new fort. But Vasilios now is all better and is not sick anymore. But when we got there 1,000,000 misquotes came and stung hubert and then he got sick. " OH *****! We made this decision to feed him all this gross medicine that we have.
Today the men got in a really big fight, and even pulled out their guns and threatened to kill each other. They started to punch and kick too. Finally I stepped in the way, and asked them what they were fighting about. Then they said they were fighting about which side of the egg to crack open, the skinny side, or the big side. A little later that day, we found out that the Hatfield family were very sick, with a fever called fluffybunnyése. We were deciding weather to leave them behind so we don't get sick, or keep them with us, when a UFO came down, and took them away. Then Vasilios caught fluffybunnyése even after the family left. It was like they put a spell on Vasilios. We saw a snake oil seller, and he said if Vasilios drank it, he would get better in a day, and he would grow green hair. We were about to buy a vial of it, when a flying pig came down, and told us not to buy it because it was fake, and wouldn't cure him. We thanked the pig, and punched the snake oil man. Later that day, we left a note saying that a flying pig lives here, and if you are lucky, he will help you. Then we folded the note, and threw it up in the air. It disappeared, and was sent to the next wagon train.
Today we came across a herd of buffalo, "Shoot them," called out one of our men. Someone shot one of the buffalo and the herd stampeded towards us. We all ran and screamed and thought they would kill us, but then, when they were about 20 yards away, they evaporated into dust with a "MOOOOOO!" Later that day we came across fort Kearny and we ran into an evil Mr. Solarz who ripped us off for our beaver pelts and also assigned 5 pages of homework. After that we went shopping at the local mall. They offered us food and clothes, but they took all of our money by selling soap only in 7 bar packs. We picked up shovels in a two-pack, but since we couldn't afford them both, the clerk ripped open the paper package and handed us only one of them. He only gave us a 47.91327% discount, though!!!!!! Then, we took our new food and other things and left the old ones behind. We were beginning to get hungry, so we opened the bacon barrel and it has been filled with evil green maggots instead of bacon. We were about to die when we saw this large building with a bright sign that read "Starbucks." We were desperate (and curious), so we walked in and all ordered this weird beverage we had never seen. The kind lady who gave them to us called them "frappuccinos." Suddenly, we all felt a burst of energy and started bouncing off the walls. We got very tired from uncontrollably bouncing, so we turned the oxen around and walked back to Fort Kearny, and this time, we were staying a couple nights.
Today we came across a river-not just any river the Kansas River, also known as the Punk Pig River. It is called this because monstrous, sassy, ham-eating pigs live there. We found that out the hard way. We were just strolling along, minding our own business. We had decided to bring 3 of our wagons on the ferry, with more of our important belongings in them. We took the other 3 wagons through the Punk Pig River. Immediately the sassy pigs started having a sass-off with the oxen. Unfortunately, the pigs had too much sass for the oxen to handle, which made the oxen flee, sending one of our wagons flying into the dangerous Punk Pig River, with 2 of our friends and our items in it. Because of this awful event, our friends survived, but broke their arms. We couldn't take it anymore. We were going to give those pigs a piece of our mind. Elias and Woo Ji Woo started to have a sass-off with the pigs. Luckily, they had some experience with sassing, so they beat the pigs. We crossed the river, but sadly, we lost some of our items and one of our wagon wheels. Oh, well. I guess oxen can't win sass-offs.
Today was crazy. We spotted a unidentified flying object, people called this weird thing a UFO. Don't know why. The men went to investigate after the "UFO" landed, they came screaming with red swelling blisters all over, they look they got giant smallpox. The sheep wandered off for a while, when I found them they were surrounded by empty bottles, with glowing green drops everywhere. When I herded them back there eyes started to glow red, and lightning shot the sheep. When the shock cleared off, the sheep just stood there. For dinner we tried to cut into a sheep, but instead of lamb chops we got flashing lights and a unknown metal type. Something is messed up. Suddenly the wind started blowing and out of the corner of my eye I saw a white light suck someone into the sky. The next morning, something enormous dropped an egg out of the sky, the yolk exploded everywhere and our chickens started to grow and grow. After the giant chicken attack, which ended in a fantastic breakfast, the stupid sheep managed to jump off a cliff. And exploded in a ball of fire which spread across the whole valley. Suddenly a fishing line dropped from the sky and caught me by the collar. As I was sucked up into the sky, I saw the sheep morph into frogs and eat the people. "Goodbye world, goodbye family, goodbye sheep/frogs." I called as I flew into the sky. Up to a weird metal block, when I was up, these weird green bumpy men came over to said, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS" and the canyon below us exploded.